LIKE A THERAPIST: Practice Self-Compassion
Learn therapeutic questions that replace shame and self-attack with accountability, context and self-compassion.
Imagine speaking to someone you love the way you sometimes speak to yourself.
“I can’t believe you screwed that up.”
“You should have known.”
“Everyone else handles life better.”
“What is wrong with you?”
Charming. Right?!
Self-compassion does not mean declaring every decision brilliant.
It means holding yourself accountable without turning your humanity into evidence for the prosecution.
Ask:
What would I say to someone I loved?
What did I know at the time?
What didn’t I know?
What was I trying to survive?
Am I judging yesterday’s self with today’s knowledge?
Can I regret what I did without making myself fundamentally bad?
What would accountability look like without cruelty?
You can say:
I wish I had chosen differently.
without saying:
I am worthless because I didn’t.
Those are completely different psychological positions.
One encourages learning.
The other creates shame.
And shame is rarely the great life coach it claims to be.
Shame is not merely unhelpful, it can be crippling.
Let it go.
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